Insults and roasts.

The 20 best 'Comedy Central Roast' jokes of all time ©Tommaso Boddi/WireImage/Getty Images. We are in the third decade of celebrity roasts on Comedy Central. The TV event kicked off with a roast ...6. Reply by a kindergartner, to a pair of 5th graders who tried to tell him Santa isn't real: "Santa brings me presents, and if Santa doesn't bring you presents, you should think about why.". 7. Female friend: "I'll just meet a doctor and become a trophy wife.". Male friend: "They don't give trophies for last place".55 Good Roasts. You are what happens when women drink during pregnancy. When I look at you, I wish I could meet you again for the first time… and walk past. You are the sun in my life… now get 93 million miles away from me. You have such a beautiful face…. But let's put a bag over that personality. There is someone out there for everyone.20 Funny Roasts for a Boring Person. Being around a boring person can kill all your energy. It'll take a lot of effort to engage with them, trying to get them to talk, or trying to understand their humorless jokes. First, good communication skills mean a lot of things, including knowing how to keep the atmosphere interesting.The Funniest Insults and Roasts. Look at the time, it's time for you to shut the f*ck up! If you really want to know about mistakes, you should ask your parents. I will ignore you so hard you will start doubting your existence. Long story short, because you wouldn't be able to follow with the long one.

I never even listen when you tell me them.”. “You bring everyone so much joy when you leave the room.”. “I would ask how old you are, but I know you can’t count that high.”. “Mirrors can’t talk. Lucky for you, they can’t laugh either.”. “Shock me, say something intelligent.”. British Insults. Nitwit: silly, or foolish, person—she’s such a nitwit . He’s a knob: he’s a dick/idiot . Dick: an idiot. Off their rocker: mad—they were off their rocker, they were. Mad as a hatter: mad—stemming from back in the day when hatters used a manufacturing process for felt that, indeed, made them mad (mercury poisoning)

Dec 18, 2023 · Whether shutting down a bully or just making your friends laugh, a well-timed comeback can go a long way. So next time you’re feeling lost for words, try one of these good roasts for kids: I don’t know your problem, but I’ll bet it’s hard to pronounce. It’s a shame your personality matches your face. That’s your opinion, and I’m ... The normal insults and roasts get boring, spice things up with a super specific, rare insult. Rare insults are original insults created to insult or roast a person in a very specific and hard ...

Here are some of the best dirty comebacks: I don’t know what your problem is, but I bet it’s hard to spell. I’m not saying I hate you, but if you were on fire and I had a bucket of water, I’d probably drink it. You’re like a broken pencil: pointless. I’m not insulting you…I’m describing you.Winston Churchill's 16 Greatest Jokes And Insults Winston Churchill was the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom twice, once from 1940 to 1945, and again from 1951 to 1955. Besides leading allied forces to victory in World War II, Churchill is considered one of the finest orators and writers of the 20th century.And who knows, maybe you'll even learn a thing or two and be able to step up your own insult game. The Top Ten. 1 You must have been born on a highway because that's where most accidents happen. I'm going to so use this one! This one is the BEST I've heard so far. This is the funniest diss I've heard all day!Ian Garner. Joan Rivers was proof that hell hath no fury like a 5-foot-2 woman from Brooklyn. The late comedian, who rose to fame through the Manhattan circuit alongside greats like George Carlin and Richard Pryor, was known for being quick on her feet with her acerbic wit — so much so that she became known as "The Queen of the Barbed One ...

Let’s explore nine of the most important rap battles, their best rap battle roasts, and the impact of battling culture today. 1. Jay Z vs. Nas. Jay-Z ’s best line: So yeah, I sampled your voice, you was using it wrong/You made it a hot line, I …

Lean in, big guy. Another comeback that doesn't miss: "Oooh, you wanna kiss me so bad.". If someone is angry—or obsessed—enough with you, the insinuation that they in fact harbor ...

In Japanese, the word insult or swear-word translates as 侮辱 / bujoku. baka 馬鹿 or aho アホ = idiot, stupid (may be used in an affectionate way in some contexts) bakayarô 馬鹿野郎 = its coarser version, and its derivative kusoyarô クソ野郎 (asshole) kuso 糞 = shit ! kusobaba 糞ばば = to insult a grand-mother / kusojiji 糞 ...Insult 'em Insulting... Artificial Intelligence Generated Insults. AI Insults. Select an insulter. Custom Insult; Personas. Trump Tweet Robot Overlord Packgod Incredible Hulk 1920s Gangster Pirate Captain William Shakespeare Drill Sergeant Teddy Roosevelt Macho Man Foghorn Leghorn Baptist Preacher. Most Insulted;Your forehead is so big it makes Kanye's ego look small. Your forehead is so big and shiney it looks like a solar field. Youre forehead so big NASA thought it was Mars. Your forehead is so big that it made Mona Lisa smile. Your forehead is so big you could roast meat on it. Your forehead is so big that if you had a stroke, it would look like ...The Best Roasts For A Bald Guy Coming your way next is a buffet of the funniest and most charming roasts, specifically tailored for the shiny-domed amongst us. The list includes witty one-liners, side-splitting bald jokes, and clever quips about that receding hairline. But remember, being bald is far from a drawback.I'll eat all your children!!" You're so meaaannnn. I like saying random things that could hit home but probably won't then come across as humorous. "You smell like shit man." "I bet your teeth are crooked." "You're probably sexually frustrated." I'm no where near as funny as I think I am. Random guy kept saying my gamer tag while I was in a ...A star-studded panel of celebrities will get to hurl their best insults toward former NFL star Tom Brady during an upcoming Netflix roast – and UFC CEO Dana …List of 20 Best Insults For Draco Malfoy. Draco, your attitude is so last season - even muggles wouldn't buy into it. I didn't know being spoiled was a magical trait until I met you, Draco. If arrogance was a spell, you'd have already mastered it, Draco. Your insults are as weak as your attempts at being intimidating.

10 Jokes to Roast Your "Ugly" Sister (With Love): "You're so unique, you're like a Picasso painting - abstract and full of surprises!". "They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and I'm clearly a beholder with impeccable taste!".Funny Ugly Insults and Roasts - Part 2 Have a laugh by telling your friends how ugly they are with our hilariously funny insults. Just make sure they know they're pretty on the inside. Greatest Ugly Roasts and Insults. Oh my God, look at you. Was anyone else hurt in the accident?Best roast of all time. You swine. You vulgar little maggot. You worthless bag of filth. As we say in Texas, you couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions printed on the heel. You are a canker, an open wound. I would rather kiss a lawyer than be seen with you. You took your last vacation in the Islets of Langerhans.12. Animal Crossing: New Horizons Nintendo Switch Game. 13. Argos Home 43cm Kettle Charcoal BBQ. 14. Wahl Colour Pro Styler Hair Clipper 9155-2417X. 15. Argos Home 4 Burner Gas BBQ with Side Burner. Picture the scene: you've just stubbed your toe and it's the same damn toe you stubbed last week.Mar 1, 2024 · Here are 30 funny roasts that rhyme: 1. You think you’re cool, but you’re just a fool. 2. Your fashion sense is a major offense. 3. Your jokes are weak, you need a technique. 4. Your dance moves are a sight to behold, a reminder of what not to be told. Definitely One Of The Meaner Insults. Tavern Bard by Rob Rey. If you want something mocking but a little more casual, this is another great one to go to, especially if you use this insult straight after the first one when casting Vicious Mockery again. It really piles on the insult, hitting them in the same place and mocking their intellect (or ...

Idiot / Stupid. Spanish insults for times when a person's intelligence is in question. Cállete el stupido elephante Shut up you stupid elephant. Chico tonto Dumb boy. Chorra Stupid. El burro sabe mas que tu The donkey knows more than you. Eres estúpido You're stupid.

List of 20 Funny Roasts for Furry Haters. 1. "Furries are having a blast while you're stuck in your own personal 'no-fun zone.'". 2. "You're not happy being stuck and a grump". 3. "You're nothing but a party pooper. Lighten up!". 4."Furries bring smiles; you bring crickets.".A roast is when someone is insulted or subjected to jokes about them, usually in front of a group of people. It’s basically like making someone the butt of …Yo mama is so dirty, she makes mud look clean. Yo mama's arms are so short, she has to tilt her head to scratch her ear. Yo mama is so scary, even Voldemort won't say her name. Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, I can't believe it's not butter. Yo mama is so clumsy, she makes Humpty Dumpty look like a gymnast.Today has been a total Morty; that's my new word for sh*t after today's events. Rick Sanchez, "Mortynight Run". 327 votes. 4. I thought the whole point of having a dog was to feel superior, Jerry. If I were you, I wouldn't pull that thread. Rick Sanchez, "Lawnmower Dog". 306 votes.Some examples include: “You don’t have to worry, I’m into pretty girls only,” “It’s so easy to talk with you, your low understanding makes things interesting,” and “Remind me when your bedtime is again.”. Below are 20 amusing roasts for someone on Discord: Chatting with you reminds me why I should avoid hell.Like 1.8M. The normal insults and roasts get boring, spice things up with a super specific, rare insult. Rare insults are original insults created to insult or roast a person in a very specific and hard-hitting way. These insults are ones that no one has likely ever heard before, because they were curated for one person, or one small group of ...2. “Stop being jealous of me, sissy. It’s not my problem that I’m better than you.”. With this clever comeback, you tell your sister her thinking is her problem. You smartly insult your sister who is just jealous of you. 3. “You should thank me, at least I’m even talking to you.”.This roast is funny and plays right into such behavior. It tells them you are not interested in their class and doing it has made you creative. This roast is silly because it implies that the teacher is so boring that the student would rather come up with new ways to avoid class than participate in class. 18.Blog. 137+ Comebacks, Roasts, and Burns for Every Situation (Funny, Clever, Unique) September 7, 2023 TME.net. When it comes to verbal exchanges, a well …25 Best Fat People Jokes: You're so fat; if you go outside now, you'd be arrested for breaking social distancing guidelines. "Never Make fun of a fat person; they already have enough on their plates.". "He's so fat; if he went camping with us, the bears would be too occupied hiding their food so we'd be safe.".

Harry Potter: Severus Snape's Best Insults. By Bisma Fida. Published Jun 1, 2023. Besides being a knowledgeable and powerful wizard, Snape is also a quick-witted Harry Potter character with some ...

“Someday you’ll go far—and I really hope you stay there.” RD.com, Shutterstock. This one cuts deep. “Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone.” This one comes from writer Dorothy...

Insult 'em Insulting... Artificial Intelligence Generated Insults. AI Insults. Select an insulter. Custom Insult; Personas. Trump Tweet Robot Overlord Packgod Incredible Hulk 1920s Gangster Pirate Captain William Shakespeare Drill Sergeant Teddy Roosevelt Macho Man Foghorn Leghorn Baptist Preacher. Most Insulted;Apr 26, 2024 · The normal insults and roasts get boring, spice things up with a super specific, rare insult. Rare insults are original insults created to insult or roast a person in a very specific and hard ... Comeback: I can't exactly help you with your head. But if you want something up your ass, I'd be happy to shove my foot up it. - hhhdhdjjdhdgrbfbdhd. Roses are red, violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, the 3rd ones for you. Comeback: Roses are red, weed is greener, you just earned yourself a kick in the wiener. - Amaru.See More 45 Funny Sarcastic Quotes to Insult Your Facebook Friends. Without further ado, here are 55 insulting quotes for fake friends, ex bf, ex gf, enemies and haters, share it on your Facebook or Tweeter as an indirect message. I'm sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. I really thought you already knew. I'm not insulting you.Hey, Duck Lips! A funny nickname for someone who has large lips is, “Hey, Duck lips!”. This is a classic burner you can use to make fun of someone with big lips. Also, this one-liner is a suitable nickname for a friend. You can use it whenever you want to make fun of them to call their attention.100 Friendly Yet Funny Insults And Great Comebacks. Your nasty behaviour is the reason for your receding hairline. Silence is the best answer for a fool. The salt on this food is enough to kill an earthworm. …3. Appreciate the little things. Give a short person a hug. 4. At least one advantage of being short is you get to be in front for all pictures taken every time. 5. Behind every short woman is a house decoration that was being hidden. 6. Being tall is an enormous responsibility; midgets look up to you.There’s a reason why there are so many soap operas in Turkish, after all — Turks address their loved ones with poetic and passionate epithets like “my breath,” “my eyes” and “my life.”. But on the flip side, they also hurl Turkish insults at each other, because let’s be real — drama is universal. There are lots of innocuous ...I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same species as you. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformation. I barf at the very thought of you. You have all the appeal of a paper cut. Lepers avoid you. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are a weed, a fungus, the dregs of this earth.Insulting and mean jokes: “you are so ugly”. You have a face only a mother can love. You are so ugly; when your parents dropped you off at school, they got a fine for littering. If laughter was medicine, your face could cure leprosy. Your face is so scary, it can bring an onion to tears.6. Reply by a kindergartner, to a pair of 5th graders who tried to tell him Santa isn't real: "Santa brings me presents, and if Santa doesn't bring you presents, you should think about why.". 7. Female friend: "I'll just meet a doctor and become a trophy wife.". Male friend: "They don't give trophies for last place"."I would love to insult you but I'm afraid I won't do it as well as nature did." — AnonCaptain002. 6. "Somewhere out there, there's a tree whose single purpose on earth is to replace the oxygen you waste. Go find it and apologize." — Alcho_Duck 7. "I have neither the time nor the crayons to explain this to you ...

One crazy one-liner you can use to roast an Indian person is, "Ask me how I know an Indian treats his wife well. They worship cows.". First, Cows are revered in Hinduism and are part of religious rituals. Also, the majority of Indians practice Hinduism. So, this is a funny comment to make if you want to get under the skin of an Indian.Here are 20 funny roasts for someone with red hair: You're the only redhead who is not red-hot. You must be a direct descendant of Satan. The only good thing about you is that red hair you flaunt like your stupidity. You look like something that came out of a red angry flame. We should sue you for abusing the color red.Dad’s joke can be so serious most times, lacking humor and more of bad puns, and bland jokes. Use this to roast your dad if he is one to say lame jokes. This roast is sure to draw laughter from everyone. Dad is like a broken record – he’s always repeating the same tired jokes. Your dad’s jokes are so lame, they should be considered a ...Instagram:https://instagram. how much is a carton of cigarettes at walmartjeeter carts reviewcraigslist englewood florida for salemarburger spring 2023 The bartender says, "We don't serve noble gasses here.". Helium doesn't react. 31. Carbon and hydrogen went on a date. I heard they really bonded. 32. If you're not part of the solution ... jasper area family service centersheetz e88 near me 26. One of Reddit's funnier and more entertaining subreddits is the /r/roastme subreddit. People take a photo of themselves holding a sign that typically says "Roast me" or "/r/RoastMe" inviting other Reddit users and members of the subreddit to fire their best shot at them. A lot of the time it is just funny and light-hearted jokes and insults ... trade letters nyt Dec 18, 2023 · Whether shutting down a bully or just making your friends laugh, a well-timed comeback can go a long way. So next time you’re feeling lost for words, try one of these good roasts for kids: I don’t know your problem, but I’ll bet it’s hard to pronounce. It’s a shame your personality matches your face. That’s your opinion, and I’m ... White teeth on your black skin look more racist than “good” on you. 6. You look like a living statue with black paint. “You look like a living statue with black paint” is another funny way to get at your black friend who is black. It is a sarcastic approach to describe how black they are.